Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Lunatic or Douchebag? 

I'm sure everyone has noticed how small some of the bluetooth ear pieces for cell phones are getting. Well, when you spend a good deal of time downtown in a large city like Los Angeles, it's created a fun new game you can play with your friends.

I used to assume that anyone I saw walking down the street talking loudly to either themselves or nobody in particular had some serious mental problem. Now, with tiny ear pieces with no visible wires, lots of people walk down the street apparently talking loudly to themselves or to nobody in particular.

So now you, too, can play LUNATIC OR DOUCHEBAG!

It goes like this. When you see someone down the block talking to open space, place your bets. A dollar is a good round betting number, or if you're still on a student budget, try a quarter. You are betting on whether the person is a lunatic or a douchebag. The distinction is premised on the fact that almost everyone who talks loudly to themselves or to nobody in particular in public is probably more than a little nuts - a lunatic. Or if they happen to have an otherwise difficult-to-see bluetooth device crammed in their ear (and they are not driving a car or doing some other activity that absolutely, positively requires the use of both of their hands) they are clearly a ginormous douchebag.

If everyone bets the same, the game is off and you should proceed to merely a) have pity on the crazy person or b) mercilessly mock the douchebag audibly as you pass by.

If you win by betting that someone is a lunatic, it is good karma to donate your winnnings to said individual.

If you win by betting that someone is a douchebag, keep the money - you earned it!


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